A notorious golfer who always lied about his score had such a bad round he went home and when his wife said, ‘How’d your round go today, dear?’ lost his head and beat the poor Woman to death.
A little later, overcome with guilt, he rang the police and said, ‘I’ve just killed my wife.’
He gave the police his name and address and about a minute later a police car screeched up the driveway and two policemen got out and banged on the door.
Police: ‘Are you the man who said he killed his wife?’
Golfer: ‘Yes, that was me?
Police: ‘Well, where’s the body?’
The golfer took the policemen into the kitchen where a woman lay motionless on the floor. A policeman took out his pen and folder and started to take notes.
Police: ‘Is this woman dead?’
Police: ‘And she is your wife?’
Police: ‘And you killed her?’
Police: ‘How did you kill her?’
Golfer: ‘I beat her to death with my one iron.’
Police: ‘How many times did you actually hit her?’
Golfer: ‘Five-but put me down for four . . .’