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Your Best Golf Tip


Elle McPherson has taken up golf and has been trying to break 100 but can’t. She’s had 100, 101,102 but still can’t crack the ton. One day she turns up at her local course and asks three guys teeing off if she can join in.

These guys are wrapped and agree immediately. She tells them of her desire to break 100 and one of the guys says, “Well, we are three handy players and we’ll give you a few tips on the way around and see what happens.”

After 17 holes, Elle is at 95 and only a short par 4 lies between her and her dream. After 3 shots she lies only 12 inches from the cup.

Elle turns to the 3 guys and says, “OK, I only need this putt to break 100 and you guys have been giving me great tips all day. The guy who gives me the best tip and helps me get this putt, I will make wild passionate love to them right here, right now! This will not be any average roll in the hay, this will be an earth-shattering, mind-blowing knee-trembling ohh my god unbelievable love-making session ever. You will be telling your children about this and they, in turn, will tell theirs and their grandchildren will still be telling their grandchildren long after you have gone!”

These 3 guys get a little nervy as the prize on offer is awesome and Elle turns to the first guy and asks, “What’s your tip?”

He replies, “It’s a little left to right breaker, just aim at that leaf and let the ball die into the cup.”

“OK,” Elle says and turns to the second guy and asks, “What’s your tip?”

He has to think of something better so he tells her, “Don’t give the hole away, you will never forgive yourself if you come up short, just hit it firm at the back of the hole!”

“OK,” she says as she takes this advice on board and turns to the third guy who, by this time, is stark naked and in an obvious state of excitement. Elle shrieks “What are you doing?”

“Pick it up,” he says, “It’s a gimme!”


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